College Rejections

March 25, 2016
Ms. Andrea Garcia

Dear Andrea,
Thank you for applying to ____________. The Committee on Admissions has reviewed your application, and due to the large number of highly qualified applicants, we regret to inform you that we –.
Thank you for applying to –.
Thank you –.
Tha – .

It didn’t even matter anymore.

What did I do wrong?  What could I have done better?

It was as if door after door had been slammed in my face. Nine out of twelve doors, to be exact.

As all my fellow seniors know, college season can be either the worst or best time of the school year. For me, the entire process, from testing to filling out applications to the actual moment of truth, was hell. I like to think that I am a person who would not be completely devastated by a college rejection, that I am someone better than the system. I know that neither a college acceptance nor a rejection defines me or my future. Yet, it is hard to feel confident about my accomplishments and myself and feel secure about my future when that goal I have been working towards these last four years becomes meaningless. Everything I have accomplished, all the hard work and late nights – meaningless.

I tried to make sense of things and put everything into perspective.  However, the truth is that as much as I tried to put “things in perspective,” I really just could not. The college process always seems  so subjective and it makes me furious.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT? I know one thing though: they did not want me. YOU WANT THEM, AND NOT ME? Are you serious? I know it sounds ugly, but do not even try to deny that you have not thought that way at least once. We all are entitled beings, and we all get somewhat bitter when we see someone succeed over us.

I was disappointed in myself. My pain became my parents’ pain and that definitely was the worst part. I would lay awake thinking about what I could have done better: my test scores, grades, and essays, but no matter how hard I thought about it, the matter of the fact is that there is nothing I could do about it now but move on.

“It all happens for a reason.”

I would roll my eyes so hard every time I would hear that. But this time around, it seems to be the most comforting line. Even though that reason is not as clear right now, hopefully four years from now, I will be grateful for the ways things worked out.

Let me tell you seniors, you are not alone and it is not just me. The first step is accepting the fact that even though we will not be where we imagined, we all must learn to be grateful for the opportunities we have. Take them and run. Berkeley was my dream school; however, I will be across the country for the next four years at American University in Washington, DC.

We all must be excited for our futures, and if we are not, we must work towards something that excites us. With the college wave behind me, I wish you all the best of luck in your future endeavors. If a door was not opened for you, it was because there was not anything behind it for you, so find one that does. Get up, take a deep breath, and dust yourself off. Take advantage of all the opportunities presented to you, and work hard for those that are not. Be great wherever you go.