There are 365 days in a year, multiply that by four, add one, and 1461 is the number of days I will be a legal, voting adult with Donald Trump as my president. That’s fine, because he legally won, thanks to the electoral college, but it’s not fair, because I didn’t vote. And it’s not that I chose not to vote because I think my vote doesn’t count. I didn’t vote because I couldn’t, because I turned 18 after November 8. But I turned 18 before January 20, so the entire 1461 days of Presidents Trump’s reign *cough* I mean presidency, I will be of voting age, and yet not have been allowed to voice my opinion. All citizens who will be of voting age on or before January 20 should be allowed to vote, especially since they will feel the impacts of the president just as much as those born two months earlier.
Straight-Haired People, Shut Up!
As a proud member of the curly-haired community, I can with little reserve say that if you have straight hair, you need to shut up. Not only is your hair ridiculously easy to deal with compared to my corkscrewed rats nest, it also conforms with the majority of images touted by fashion and beauty magazines of today, making you just that much closer to modern standards. I’m sorry you think your hair is boring, but at least you don’t have to douse it in conditioner in order to run a brush through it. Don’t get me wrong—I love my curly hair, but can the straight-haired people of this world please stop complaining?
The Bowling Green Massacre
It is embarrassing that an atrocity such as this has been ignored for so long, and no, I’m not talking about Kellyanne Conway. I’m talking about the terrible Bowling Green Massacre. How could the citizens of America go on with their normal lives without so much as recognizing that nothing is going on in Bowling Green, Kentucky? It’s not like nothing happens in Kentucky that often! I am asking for you to wake up, open your eyes, and look at the stunning number of dead bodies (zero), and say, “I will not stand for this! I will not idly stand by and let nobody be killed! This is America, damnit!”
Don’t Discredit the Media
Since I write for the school paper, I have plenty of opinions on newspapers and the media in general, and I am the first to say that media isn’t perfect. But now is not the time to turn against the media, because it is the counterweight, the last source of truth. By discrediting the media, the current government is manipulating the general population to believe that journalists are criminals who make up news. This is helpful because when an important story that is disagreeable to the government is aired, it will be easy to believe it is just another lie. Do not discredit the media; it is the media’s job to fact check, and if that bother’s you, deal with it.